Unintelligentsia

Motherfucking DA of the year nigga!

I was walking into work one morning, and right as I was about to enter the my building, Jack McCoy, district attorney from Law & Order busts out the door, he tells me that he needs my assistance with a big case. As we walk towards the parking garage I tell him we should take my car since its closer. “Good idea” he says, but as we get nearer to my car it becomes apparent that someone has stolen my tires!

Strangely, even though the process of removing a tire from a rim is very difficult and time consuming, the thief still decided not to take the rims, only the tires, which is made even stranger by the fact that I left the car naught ten minutes before!! Bum bum bummm! Good thing Jack McCoy is here to help me catch the perp!

The security cameras are no help at all! Dammit! The car is obscured behind a cement pillar. We’ll have to interrogate the staff. McCoy is great at this. He slaps a parking attendant around and eventually learns that perhaps we didn’t investigate the scene of the crime closely enough. Sure enough, the perp, a Mexican immigrant, is sleeping in the back seat! He was so sleepy after removing the tires that he stashed the tires in the truck and took a nap in the back seat. Another case solved by the team McCoy! Yeah!

And THAT is why it’s an extremely bad idea to take two Benedryls before going to bed.